Proclamation of the Kingdom
Fruit of the Mystery: Trust in God
Often, my prayer resembles the words spoken by the boy’s father in Mark’s Gospel, who has come to beg the Lord to heal his son: “But if you can do anything, have compassion on us and help us” (Mark 9:22), and then, “I do believe, help my unbelief” (Mark 9:24)! I do believe, and I trust Jesus can help, usually, but part of me always wrestles with surrender. I am often a woman of little faith who craves signs and wonders to help me believe.
I love the rosary, especially the 54-rosary Novena devotion. A few years ago, I was unable to shake the Spirit’s nudging to pray it and to do so outside away from the distractions of my home. Since I live on a busy street, I decided to do laps around my yard’s perimeter. Think Joshua and friends and the Walls of Jericho (Joshua 6)!
One day, as I made the circuit, upset by the current state of my life, I looked to heaven and aired my grievances: “Lord, what do you want from me? I never miss Sunday Mass, and I diligently pray the rosary. I have even given my life to telling people how awesome you are, and this is my reward? A life plagued, especially in the last six months, with many hardships — deaths, financial struggles, and family stress! Again, Lord, I ask, what do you want from me?”
As I completed the behind-the-house leg of my path and turned to face the highway, I looked up to see a tractor-trailer passing by. On the side of the truck was the word FIDELITY.
It felt like a note from God, since “fidelity” is a Latin-rooted word meaning faithfulness. “Is that what you want?” I asked God.
How could I ignore the timing of that truck’s appearance? My trust grew exponentially from that godcidence moment, this situation that the world would see as coincidence but that I knew was God.
Just be faithful. I can do that, Lord. I will continue to pray, hope, and wait on you — one rosary bead at a time.
About Allison: Allison Gingras shares the Catholic faith with honesty, humor, and experiences from every life. Allison created the Stay Connected Journals for Catholic Women (OSV), which includes her titles — Seeking Peace and The Gift of Invitation. She is a podcast host, blogger, inspirational speaker, and Catholic social media consultant. Learn More:: ReconciledToYou.com